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Katie and Sarah's story

On advice to other carers

Katie wishes her sister-in-law had made use of the hospice services earlier on, but Sarah had not wanted to admit that she was dying.

I would say to access as much support as you can right from the beginning. I mean, I really wished that we had accessed the whole space much earlier on in Sarah's illness because we were offered that. I'll say I was offered that. Because of the difficulty that she had in coming to terms with the fact that this was a terminal illness, she was very, very reluctant. And I just, with hindsight, it's the care that she got there was very differently focused to the care at the hospital.

So even if you were still having and even while Sarah was still having an active treatment, I would have somehow rather tried to work it that we had that other. Maybe, try to get her in for respite or something like that. And that would have just opened up all these doors that came and felt, in some ways felt slightly too late for some things. There was a lot of stuff that Sarah could have got involved in that might have helped her process the things that she was going through or even just helped her use the time that she had where...

She was always trying to find things to do that she could do just lying in bed. And again have all these things going at the hospice but which she could go and enjoy like art classes, whether you're in a bed or not in a bed, it doesn't matter. Talking groups where you can just go and just talk about your experience with other people who are going through the same thing. I think a lot of those things would've been really beneficial for her but also would have opened up more support for herself and the family. It's kind of the situation that we found ourselves in.

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