I don't think my mum would have been as calm, safe, or happy without the support of the nurses and doctors at Marie Curie.
Mum had felt a bit off for a while, but never went to the doctors. She kept saying she must have a pulled muscle.
After a few months, I knew something wasn't right, so I rang the doctor. Mum went to the hospital that night for some tests, and next thing I know I get a phone call saying her leg had broken in half. That was probably one of the worst times, because I couldn't do anything to help her.
Shortly after, we found out that she had small cell lung cancer and it had spread everywhere. It was so advanced there was nothing they could do. At this point they said she only had around nine weeks to live. I couldn't believe what I was hearing. I was devastated.
"The Marie Curie Hospice was the best option for Mum"
Mum was in the hospital for about two weeks, then wanted to come home. But when she was at home, she just cried and panicked. It was very emotionally challenging and it was difficult to calm her down.
Mum felt safer at Marie Curie. Everyone at the hospice had time for her. She loved the nurses; they were so kind. They'd come in to make sure she was OK, and even helped her have a little bit of a wash. I think when you're a little bit more relaxed, you feel safer and don't panic as much.
Mum especially liked the chef – she thought he was the best chef ever! She had lost so much weight by this point but loved the chef's soup. She'd wait for this soup every day. My dad used to joke, "It's probably just Heinz but don't tell her!" which made us laugh.
It was just a nice environment at the hospice. I remember one time it was nice outside and I said, "Come on Mum, let's go see the fish outside and have a little stroll." As I pushed her wheelchair, I remember her saying, "Jess, I don't half love you." I replied, "I love you too, Mum." It was such a special moment, just the simple things making us happy. She was my best friend.
"I felt at ease knowing she wasn't suffering anymore"
On her final evening, I turned up at the hospice and I've never seen anything like it. The nurse and my dad were holding her up and she was dribbling. She couldn't speak. It was heartbreaking to see my mum like this, you don't expect these things that happen within cancer.
She was given something to relax a little, and her demeanour changed. We were with her. I put moisturiser on her face, arms and hands. I gave her a little massage. I painted her nails, combed her hair, gave her a kiss and said, "You're ready now, Mum. I love you." She sat up, looked around and then laid down and stopped breathing. It was quite peaceful.
"My experience with Marie Curie is calling me to become a nurse"
When my mum was in the Marie Curie Hospice, she kept saying, "If I get better, I think I might volunteer here." So I said, "I think I might one day, too."
I set up a GoFundMe as I wanted to spend every moment I had with Mum. It ended up raising around £1,200 by the time she passed away. She was so happy when I showed her. Then at Christmas, my daughter Myla, who's four, wrote 50 Christmas cards to give out to people Marie Curie were looking after in the hospice. It made me very proud.
I hope to become a nurse, which stemmed from Marie Curie and the care my mum received in the hospice. I've been doing the Access to Nursing course and will hopefully start my nurse training soon. I'd like to be there for people at the end of their lives, and their family members, and help them with what we experienced. Everyone deserves a caring person to help them towards the end of life.
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