Dying is a normal process, and there are certain signs that help us understand what stage someone has reached in the dying process. This page explains what stages people might go through in the weeks, days and hours before dying. Knowing more about the stages people might go through when they are dying can help you to feel prepared.
If you do not feel ready to read this information just yet, you can come back to it at any time.
Last weeks before dying
Some people ask what signs people will have in the last 40 days, month or final weeks before dying. We cannot say exactly what symptoms people will have at different times. Everyone is different and not everyone will have these symptoms.
In the last weeks before dying, people might experience:
- feeling weak and tired
- sleeping more
- difficulty with day-to-day tasks like dressing and washing
- feeling hot or cold
- cold hands or feet
- loss of appetite (eating less)
- bladder or bowel problems
- breathlessness (dyspnoea)
- pain
- feeling or being sick (nausea or vomiting)
- weight loss
- difficulty swallowing food
- being confused or delirious
- being less able to do things they normally do
- withdrawing from things around them
- not wanting to see people.
Some of these things are a normal and natural part of dying. But others might make the person feel uncomfortable or worried. If any symptoms are bothering the person, tell their doctor, nurse or care home staff. They should help to make the person as comfortable as possible during this time. There are things that may help, including medicines.
Last days and hours before dying
Some people ask what might happen in the last few days, 48 hours or 24 hours before death. We do not know exactly what symptoms people have at different times. Everyone is different and not everyone will have these symptoms.
In the last days and hours before dying, many people experience:
- sleeping more
- being drowsy
- being restless or agitated
- difficulty swallowing fluids
- not responding to sounds or things around them
- talking or communicating less
- changes to their breathing pattern
- movements like twitching or jerking
- mottled skin (blotches or patches that are a different colour to the person’s usual skin tone)
- noisy secretions when breathing
- changing between heavy breathing and slow breathing, sometimes with gaps between breaths
- peeing (urinating) much less or not at all
- skin colour changes (sometimes the skin will look slightly blue)
- not being able to close their eyelids.
Some of these things are a normal and natural part of dying. But others might make the person feel uncomfortable or worried. If any symptoms are bothering the person, tell their doctor, nurse or care home staff. They should help to make the person as comfortable as possible during this time. There are things that may help, including medicines.
If you’re worried about your family member or friend who is dying
Tell the person’s doctor or nurse if they have new symptoms or are uncomfortable. Some of the signs listed on this page are a normal part of dying and will not be distressing for the person. Other symptoms, such as pain, nausea and breathlessness, can be upsetting or uncomfortable. There are things that may help with them, including medicines. Speak to the person’s doctor, nurse or care home staff for more information about these symptoms.
If you’re not sure who to ask and they live at home, contact their GP. If they live in a care home, speak to the staff who may contact their GP or a palliative care team if needed.
How can you tell when someone will die?
It’s hard to tell when someone is approaching the end of their life and when they might die. This is because everyone is different – there’s not one pattern or timeframe people follow.
On this page, we have listed some of the common symptoms and signs people have during different stages of dying. These signs are for people with a terminal illness who are expected to die and people dying naturally in old age. This is based on research and expertise in this area.
Not everyone will get these symptoms. And some people will get these symptoms and not die soon. People who are not dying and people who do not have a terminal illness can also get these symptoms too. For example, some people who are older and frail might have these symptoms but it does not necessarily mean they are dying.
Ask your family member or friend’s doctor, nurse or care home staff if you want to know when they might be expected to die. And speak to their doctor, nurse or care home staff if they have any new symptoms or symptoms that are making them uncomfortable.
Watch: What happens when someone is dying?Watch: What happens when someone is dying?
This video explains the changes you might see when someone is dying. It uses words that are easy to understand.
Can doctors or nurses tell me when someone might die?
It’s hard to estimate when someone might die, even for doctors and nurses. This is because everyone is different. There’s not one pattern people follow and they cannot predict what might happen in the future.
You can ask the doctor or nurse how long your family member or friend might live for. Or they can ask them themselves if they want to. The doctor or nurse will not be able to give an exact answer. But they may be able to give you an estimate based on their current condition. And they may be able to tell you when they think your family member or friend is in their final days. It’s important to understand that this is only an estimate and they will not be able to know for certain what will happen to an individual.
Can a person tell when they are dying?
Sometimes, a person who is very ill tells other people that they think they might be dying. Some people do say this when they are close to death. For other people, it might be that they feel unwell at the time but then feel better again for a while.
If someone says they think they are dying, you could ask them why they think so or reassure them that you are there. Try to listen to anything they feel they want to say. If they seem upset or uncomfortable, speak to their doctor, nurse or care home staff.
How can I support someone who is dying?
If your family member or friend is dying, you could:
- talk to their doctor or nurse if they are worried, upset or uncomfortable
- organise other family or friends to visit, if the person wants
- organise a faith leader or spiritual leader to visit, if the person wants
- ask them if there’s anything they want to do, like going outside or listening to the radio
- ask them if they have preferences for their care in the coming weeks or days
- spend time with them – they might find having you nearby is reassuring
- do things they might enjoy – they might find it comforting if you read their favourite book, listen to music they like or hold their hand.
Looking after yourself when someone is dying
If someone close to you is dying, this may be a very difficult time for you. You might have practical things to sort out and be dealing with a lot of emotions.
Try to eat, sleep and rest if you can. If you are the person’s closest family member or friend, you might feel as if you have to take on everything yourself. But getting help means that you can look after yourself and spend quality time with your family member or friend.
If you need more information or support, speak to the person’s doctor or nurse. You can also call our free Support Line for emotional support on 0800 090 2309 or email us at support@mariecurie.org.uk.